Janet Bushey October 16, 1933-September 8, 2018.
I will start with 2 digressions, before I begin:
- I am a born-again Christian
- I am a nurse by profession
My life, given these positions, have been quite humbling. Two things have I learned from these two things; People die often and most people ignore this fact or hide from it. Taxes and death.
In the movie, ‘Inside Man’, staring Clive Owen, he opens the movie with a soliloquy; in this soliloquy, Owen states:
“Listen closely to what I am about to say as I choose my words carefully and I never repeat myself”.
In Shakespeare’s Macbeth, act 5 scene 5, Macbeth is mourning for Lady Macbeth. She has passed and he is crushed:
”She should have died hereafter.
There would have been a time for such a word.
Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
20Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time,
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player
25That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
God’s word tells us that life is ‘but a vapor. Here one minute, gone the next’. In many ways, Macbeth is correct. Take advantage of the time, for the end draws near, much faster than you may think. Reconcile with the Lord. Love those that are closest to you. Time stops for no one.
Macbeth, was without; He saw life in the mortal sense only. He was at best, cynical and at worse, skeptical. Much bitterness over his beloved’s death. Christians see life as a stepping stone to real life. It is actually a beginning, not the end. We look to the day when we will see Christ, glory and Heaven. We are sad on one hand, but encouraged that we will see our passing loved ones again and that they are now in a better place. We will physically miss them. Time heals, supposedly. ‘I’m’ still waiting’. Everyone experiences death in their own way. It is personal. What I go through, the next person may not. Hence, we give everyone the time they need to heal.
In my life, the earliest memories I have of my Mother was when we lived in Hartford, Connecticut; I first Met Janet on April 18, 1958; the first memory was on a day I was ill and didn’t go to school. I was most likely in kindergarten at the time. My Mom took me on a bus to the shopping district in downtown Hartford.
The second one was much more dramatic in that my Mom sent me to Richmond’s grocery store for a pack of smokes and a ½ gallon of milk. I was no more than 5 years old.
My Mother was born in Hartford, Connecticut on October 16, 1933. She was raised by her late Father, Salvatore Vicorito and late Mother, Yetta. Mom had three sisters: Gloria, Sheryl and Michele.
Mom graduated from Hartford Public High School. In 1955, she was wed to my Father, Frank M. Bushey. This marriage covenant bore three children; Michael, Scott and Daniel. Additionally, she leaves 11 grandchildren and 10 great grandchildren.
Janet and Frank started small. They had two bits in their pockets when they were married. My Dad tells the story that he gave my Mother one of them and he kept one.
Mom worked various jobs that I can recall. One job was a waitress @ Delmonico’s restaurant in W. Hartford and another time, a bookeeper @ Veeder Root factory in Hartford. In 1969 the Bushey’s bought their first home in West Hartford, Connecticut. Soon after, working hard, they upgraded to a larger home in the same community.
In 1972, my father, who was a house painter decided it would be in our best interest to move south where the weather fit his occupation better, to the warmth of Florida; the Bushey’s settled in Margate, Florida. It was here that Janet spent the majority of her life.
Janet retired from the School Board of Broward County, Florida, in 1991; Her last formidable assignment was as the executive secretary to the administrator of Atlantic Vocational School.
Janet was an avid reader and loved novels of all sorts. My Mother was an intelligent gal and all of us gained many moments of golden wisdom from her over the years; she was tough as nails as a Mother and would never let anyone talk down on her family. If we were in the wrong, we suffered under her discipline, but if not, she defended us to the end.
In time, My Father and my Mother moved to various locations in Florida; once to the Villages in the north of Florida; they owned a beautiful home there. They even had a golf cart! Eventually, they returned down to South Florida and bought a condo in Boca Raton. Her final resting place was in Coconut Creek, Florida where they had a beautiful Villa home.
My Mother was a hard-working lady and the end result was that they owned two properties, upon her death. I reflect on this often, knowing that my parents were ordinary people; barely educated beyond high school and even in all of that, they showed how hard work will profit you if you just dig in!
In 1993, I was saved by God’s grace; My mother who was a Roman Catholic on my grandfather’s side and a Jew by birth, through her Mother, Yetta, watched my life as Christ changed everything about me. In April of 1998, I asked my Mother to accompany me to church and she came to faith, confessing her sin and coming to Christ for resolve. It is during this time that the mass of change occurred in my Mom. Over the years, one could see her tenderness increase for all mankind; Her love towards my Dad became richer and much more mature. She was tolerant to the degree that it would even frustrate me, a fellow believer. It was a good yard stick that she used to even refine me as her son always pointing me to Christ when I became frustrated and impatient.
Janet was a tough cookie, suffering under the wrath of lung cancer, having a lobectomy about 12 years ago; 7 years ago, she was hit by bladder cancer and the surgeons removed her bladder. The end result of this complication was a urostomy bag; never did she complain and what was amazing was that she took care of it for herself for most of the last years. In the end, the cancer ravaged the rest of her body. Through all of it, she never complained.
In the end, we had Hospice come in and help us through this time. I learned much of my Mom through this fire. I watched her change back into a little girl and came to speak to her as ‘my little girl’. She was so precious to me.
The Puritans have a saying: ‘Run the race, fight the good fight and finish well’. My Mom did just that; she was tough as iron and a great mentor for all of us. Jesus was a meek and mild savior. In this meekness however, he was not weak and neither was my Mother.
Matthew chapter 5 says it all:
5 And seeing the multitudes, he went up into a mountain: and when he was set, his disciples came unto him: 2 And he opened his mouth, and taught them, saying,
3 Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.
10 Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.
12 Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.
13 Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men. 14 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. 15 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. 16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and tglorify your Father which is in heaven.
Jesus was either a liar, a lunatic or told the truth. 3 measly years, he spoke. Yet, in this short time, has become the greatest prophet of all time. Consider Aristotle, Socrates and Plato; Tolstoy, Shakespeare, Hemingway, Twain, Dickens, Homer. Pick and choose your authors. The bible has been the most mass-produced writing ever. It remains on the best seller list. In just three years, Christ literally ripped time in half. Consider the terms B. C (before Christ) and A.D. (anno domini-the year of our Lord). How is it that a man with a ministry of just three, measly years has affected this life as we know it, like he had?
Janet was a member of New Presbyterian Church of Wilton Manors.